An Empty Stage

We were there once, at the center of the universe. We performed on stage for all the world to see. The lot of us were young and powerful. We were charming and lively. We were the chameleons, changing to what the world expected of us.

Now though, our troupe has scattered. Love, once given freely is now horded. Camaraderie that was once unbeatable has been left broken and bleeding backstage. Power, once shared is now forgotten and put into phylacteries for display on shelves.

The memories put away and left to collect dust. It is obvious that our bond is one of those memories. Best forgotten, I suppose rather than cultured and put into use. I know that deep within your Cabinet of Curiosity, I exist as a mere trinket that you fondle on lonely nights. Other than that, I am a relic of days past.

Still, I would believe that even in our advanced years, you would not have forgotten our magick. I cannot blame you though, it was I who left the stage so many years ago. It was I that did not come back. I left you there to hold the limelight and the crowd.

I was dying, you see. I was in a decaying orbit around you. I was the shadow to your light. I always walked behind a step and off to the right a bit. You seemed to lead and I followed.

Well, that’s what I saw — what I felt.

I was the nobody to your somebody. I was just another body in the chorus line. I was never the star. I was not the headliner. I suppose I could have been happy with that too if there were enough crumbs being spilled my way.

But I made that fall in disgrace too, I suppose.

We appeared ordinary and mundane. We were anything but. We were the Lords of the Universe. The Princes of Time and Space. There were none that could stand in our way. Other than those who were there before us. In retrospect, I can see those fledgling souls behind us as well as those magnificent beasts ahead. We were on the middle path then.

I would not have guessed I would have to hold my own spotlight and carry the show. I’ve not talent for that it seems. I was apparently born unto the role of assistant, of chorus rather than talent.

Some of us are destined for greatness. Not me though. My duty was one of support. Mine was to make the talent look good. I was the clown, the buffoon. I was the fat jester to your lean kingly role. I was the idiot on stage for us all.

No one thought to see what was inside of me. No one thought to ask if I was comfortable in my place. I never thought to ask either. It was just the thing for me to do.

Now, all these years have been mostly empty because I still played the part of chorus when I was to be in the spotlight. I could not be my own star because I was never used to playing that part. Mine was of harmony and backup.

I had no entourage to support me and I was not skilled enough to put a starring role together. So, here I am, trying to fill my own skin and play my own part.

Alone.